PREPPER NEWS
Tim Ralston, an Arizona
native, has spent about $10,000 getting his family ready for the end of the
world. Oh, yeah, and in the process a weapon backfired and blew off half of his
thumb. Don’t ya hate it when that happens?
Any way, Tim was planning to use a cargo container to make
an underground shelter for his family. But, having blown off half his thumb, he
went to plan B and found a nice cabin next door to another prepper. He and his
new buddy are “…actually working out a program…to start building shelters and
selling them."
Once again, Doomsday as a profit center. *sigh*
HALF BAKKER
Former televangelist Jim Bakker has an enormous $6 million
dollar debt still unpaid to the IRS. I think we can all agree that there’s
nothing worse than being in debt to the IRS. They are heartless, merciless, and
vindictive and like the hounds of hell, they cannot be stopped. Until the debt
is paid. Thus, Bakker is now hocking “survival products” to “help his true
believers live through the coming apocalypse.” Now, I have to mention that
among his offerings is “a $100 Silver Solution Total Body Cleanse Kit, which
includes enemas.” A blog known as The Talking Points Memo compared Jim’s prices
with other apocalypse-minded sellers and found that his goods are, in some
case, priced 100 percent higher than the competition. Did we mention he owes
the IRS $6 million smackers?
ALIEN INVASION COMING TO A TOWN NEAR YOU!
“On August 18th, 2013, the alien invasion will
begin. The government has been under the thumb of these reptoids for years and
now, the truth will be revealed. There will be rivers of blood and natural
disasters on a scale that this world has never seen. The end of the world will
come for many and the rest will be awakened to the fact that we are not free,
have never been free and will never be free. We are under the thumb of a race
that sees no value in our existence outside of slavery. We are mindless drones
to them and when the 8th month of 2013 is upon us, they will show us their
wicked hand.”
Wow! Scary stuff. The above comes from “Ringside
Report: The heart of boxing.” The heart of boxing seems to be filled with UFO
stuff, because that’s pretty much what dominates the site. Strange, eh?
So, to recap, the lizard-like folk that have
already enslaved us will reveal their nefarious plans and, apparently, kill a
bunch of us – I wonder if they have the cookbook “To Serve Man?” – because we
are valueless. I also wonder if they’re afraid of the fierce mongoose.
Mongeese? Mongooses?
And happy trails to you, too!
