MY PREDICTIONS FOR 2012

Happy New Year!

And especially this year, 2012, because some “experts” want us to believe it’ll be the last year!

While everyone is making resolutions so there will be something to break come February, I’ve been pondering 2012 – the last year…not! – and I have a few predictions:

• As the year progresses, more and more nutcases will pop out from under their respective rocks to make absurd pronouncements regarding the END OF DAYS!
  
  
• Many unfortunate, deluded people will give away their property and money in anticipation of the END OF DAYS!
  
  
• Many other people will bankroll fly-by-night pulpit pounders in the hope of securing a heavenly place in the afterlife following the END OF DAYS!
  
  
• Somewhere, someone will conclude that with December 21, 2012 rapidly approaching, it’s a sign that he/she can commit mass murder because, after all, it’s the END OF DAYS!
  
  
• Local and national TV newscasts will all carry a similar story sometime during the year that shows Mr. and Mrs. Panic-Like-It’s-the-End-of-the-World with a basement/bomb shelter/ark filled with enough flour, pasta and canned goods to feed a small Central American country because it’s the END OF DAYS!
  
  
• Church attendance in some areas will increase because where better to find solace and comfort with the approach of the END OF DAYS?
  
  
• Pat Robertson and his ilk will spend much of their time pointing fingers at the gay and lesbian communities for bringing about the END OF DAYS!
  
  
• While national media will largely ignore this whole silly thing, local media, especially TV, will happily trot out some itinerate end-of-the-world guy sporting a funky soul patch, a 1987 mullet, Buddy Holly glasses and one eye that looks everywhere but where it should and wearing a natty black suit over a black shirt and a black bolo tie. This “expert” will tell us, while we’re rolling on the floor with the giggles, that it is, in fact, the END OF DAYS!
  
  
• President Obama and all Democrats will be blamed for the END OF DAYS!
  
  
• And, finally, in 2012 there will not be an END OF DAYS!