BetaBeat, the site for the “lowdown on high tech,” ran a piece recently on an online dating service for survivalists.
Well, why not? Even the Doomsday/End of Days/Apocalypse/Armageddon worshippers want love and romance; cupid in chainmail. And, let’s face it, when Doomsday/End of Days/Apocalypse/Armageddon arrives (not), we’ll all want to hook-up to relieve that pent-up tension from watching the world end. Why not have a fellow doomster by your side with whom to lip lock and do the nasty?
Enter Survivalist Singles, a site for the prepper subculture where like-minded paranoid survivalists can find an equally paranoid mate; a snuggle bunny for the underground bunker or the mountain top observation nest. Nothing says “you’re my love muffin” quite like a 10-inch survival knife and a hefty .45 automatic.
CNN reported that Survivalist Singles has a membership of nearly 1,700 and nearly 1,200 of them are male. Oh, boy, there’s going to be a real donnybrook over the 30 percent or so of the membership that’s female. The ladies will feel so special. Let’s do the math. There are about 1200 guys vying for 500 gals. That’s like two and a half fully-armed, locked-and-loaded, ready-to-rock-and-roll hard-cases for each fully-armed, locked-and-loaded, ready-to-rock-and-roll chick.
And don’t you know, in their fantasy life, the survivalist men all imagine the women look like Pam Anderson in Barb Wire or Jessica Alba in Dark Angel instead of the late Anne Ramsey (the evil mother) in Goonies? Oh, let’s be fair, the women probably would rather have a guy who looks like Jon Hamm in Mad Men or Ben Affleck in The Town instead of Danny Trejo in Machete. (No offense to Danny, he’s my number one bad guy, but as the afore mentioned Machete demonstrated, an onscreen lover he ain’t.)
In these days leading up to Doomsday (not!) it’s “cool” to be is a prepper. Prepper chic in camo and canvas, out in the woods working up a carnal appetite while stalking, killing, gutting and cooking a nice fat squirrel or bunny. And, apparently, Survivalist Singles is just the place to find that perfect mate with whom to share that woodland bounty.
As an aside, I recall from my long-ago high school days, all of my dating was survivalist fare.
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