RAPTURE? WHAT RAPTURE?

A North Carolina couple moved there from Reno after quitting their jobs, cashing in their 401K’s and building a website to the tune of $250,000. Wow! I’ll build you a website that will sing and dance for a quarter of a million. I don’t how, exactly, but for that kind of money, I’ll learn. Quickly.

But, I disgress…(shiny babbles distract me, too.)

So, Goofus and Doofus (not their real names), the couple in question, uprooted their lives and set up a website. It’s a very comprehensive site, filled with information and misinformation on a ton of stuff related to, however tenuously, the End of Days/Armageddon/Doomsday/the End Times/the Apocalypse.

“How about if we built you a house able to withstand 250 mile per hour winds, was completely fire proof, and would take impact from a nuclear device and still survive? If we could do that it would be great. We did it,” Goofus told a reporter from KRNV TV in Reno. 

So, making money on the website by selling all manner of survival gear has now prompted them to host a convention in Reno this summer that will feature speakers and plenty of vendors and, by extension, plenty of opportunities for good people to be parted from their money.

"Bottom line we really care to inform people about what they're up against," Goofus explained. He and Doofus made a point of letting people know that they are Christians.

Now that’s where I got confused. Clearly Goofus and Doofus aren’t GOOD Christians. If they were, why would they be bothering to build a disaster-proof house or dig hole for a bunker? Don’t the good Christians believe that with the Second Coming they will be “caught away,” that is vanished from earth to join Jesus elsewhere?

Ah ha! Goofus and Doofus know they are not good Christians and that they won’t be “caught away.”

Either that or they figure, hey, what’s wrong with making a little pocket money before Armageddon? It’s not like peddling hokum is a crime, right?

Of course, Goofus denies using fear as a sales tactic. “That's not what we're about, we're about purchasing to be prepared.”

And if you believe that, I’ve got a swell little Doomsday bunker out in Death Valley you can pick up for a song.